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Daily Jokes 7/6/11
Everyday I post monologue jokes from relevant daily news articles. Here are the jokes for today (always appreciate your feedback):
Romney raises $18.25M; Gingrich in debt
GOP presidential hopeful Mitt Romney has raised $18.25 million, Newt has raised only $2 million and is in debt, and Anthony Weiner raises the inside of Dockers khakis. HELLO! This thing on!? What’s going on out there? Man, it’s crazy out there….rough crowd. ahhhhh it’s crazy. What else?
Report: Atlanta superintendent knew about cheating
Former Atlanta schools Superintendent Beverly Hall knew about cheating allegations on standardized tests but either ignored them or tried to hide them. Georgia was under a lot of pressure to raise test scores. They said there is no way they are going to let Alabama, Mississippi, and any 4 year old outside of the South be smarter than them any longer.
Facebook to make “awesome” announcement
Facebook has scheduled a news conference to announce the launch of what it termed “something awesome.” Zuckerberg must have finally gotten laid.
Massive dust cloud rolls into Phoenix.
A massive dust storm enveloped areas of Arizona on Tuesday night, causing low visibility and delaying flights in and out of the state’s largest airport. After seeing the event, Steven Spielberg has already acquired the rights to a new motion blockbuster titled “The Perfect Storm II: When Dust Attacks”. Look for it late fall, starring PigPen from Charlie Brown.
Jay Leno bombs with Casey Anthony jokes.
Well somewhere Conan O’Brien was laughing
GM to offer free car insurance
To spur sales, General Motors is offering a year’s worth of car insurance along with any new GM car purchased in the states of Washington or Oregon. I dont’ think this is the right enticement for Washington or Oregon – don’t offer free car insurance, offer free meth. Sales will go through the roof in those states.
